Do narcissists always lie?

1. Do narcissists always lie?
   

2. 📷 Mark Harris, 10 years with an overt and 5 years with a covert narcissist Updated Nov 10 2019 Originally Answered: Why do narcissists keep lying? Why do narcissists keep lying?You mean like when they keep on lying even after you’ve got them pinned in the corner with no where to go and the evidence of their lying is so loud and obnoxious it’s slamming like a screen door in a category 5 hurricane? Something like that?Narcissists have a different and unexpected train of thought and it’s damn near impossible to unravel by trying to apply logic or reason to many of their behaviors and actions.To me, the answer to this rests in a couple of things and maybe these in combination. One, there is their ego which will cause them to ferociously resist and deny any perceived attempt of someone causing them to lose face or be exposed for any wrong doings.Two, and usually in addition to the above, there is sometimes a strong element of sadism in their personality. And what this translates to is that they derive pleasure from the crazy making and frustration it causes their targets/victims of their scheming and lying. I believe many of them have covert sadistic desires and this negatively charged and seemingly innate characteristic also drives them to lie no matter what just because.They know full well that doing so adds on torment and torture to the person they are continuing to lie to about whatever it is they are lying about. They get off on this and, at some point, if this behavior is recognized by you then it can very well dwarf the problem of whatever the original issue was they were lying about because that kind of behavior and just the magnitude of even the thought process behind it is venomous, callous, and just plain evil.So, between their egos and their sadistic desires to torment the people they have already hurt who they desire to hurt even more, the truth is rarely spoken by them no matter what kind of hard hitting concrete evidence you have that exposes the truth. And when you realize this much about them, then it leaves you no choice but to come to the final conclusion that it is an impossibility to legitimately and authentically explore any problems or set any course for corrective action or make any improvements in your relationship and dealings with them. They simply won’t allow it to happen.Your have two choices at this point of recognition. Either relent to them and just give up on them ever being honest and silently nod giving them permission to continue forcing you to accept an ongoing and unacceptable state of affairs towards you just to satisfy their psychotic and cruel desires, which going forward will forever replace any possibility of your own mental and emotional satisfaction with unwarranted and undeserved mental and emotional torture and torment for you. That’s what they want.OR tell them to take their lies and their cruelty and shove them both up their ass because anyone would deserve better than the above. You don’t have to play their games anymore after you cut them out of your life and go no contact.NOTEThe following is an amendment to the answer above where I am providing additional distinctions that I made about narcissists and the different reasons they lie that I observed personally. You can read it or take the answer above as is but I think you will find these more detailed observations not only beneficial to consider but probably very familiar.If there is anyone at all here on quora who tried, struggled, and applied energy and effort to figuring out precisely the reason for the lies and the off putting mysterious actions and behaviors surrounding it all then it was me. I can say that with absolute certainty because I deliberately targeted and worked very hard to unravel the answer to what are all the different reasons and motivations behind why they lie so damn much and there are many reasons and some of them are diabolical and sadistic.Sometimes they lie to hide things and that is the only reason. This is why a normal non disordered person lies as well.Sometimes they lie just to toy with and torment you in a subversive way that they know permits them the advantage of plausible deniability to suppress or thwart any efforts you might launch in the future to confront them while knowing themselves that they are duping you to start with and thinking to themselves how clever they are to both lie to you and watch you eating it up like it’s all true thinking the whole time how fun it is that you’re ignorant of the lies. They weave these kind of lies into seemingly normal conversation while knowing that, if you ever were to become suspicious or wise to the lie, that you can't easily confront them because they know you don’t have any access to information or evidence to support any suspicions that might ever arise and they know that works to their benefit because if you say anything then you can be made out to be mistaken, confused, insecure, or crazy take your pick. In a case like this, I’m mostly speaking about things that you initially don’t know they are lying about at all and that you believe them at their word at first because you have no reason not to believe them. However, let’s say you do the unexpected and you start connecting the dots and you start questioning things that don’t add up. If through some quiet due diligence and research and evidence gathering you manage to acquire information that reveals to you the kind of shit show they are trying to pull and you manage to expose the entire sadistic game they were playing with you then they will realize and know that you got them good but they will never admit that. I’ve seen them go speechless and into shutdown mode because nobody has ever shined the light right on top of their doo doo tests quite like that and they are used to getting away with it without anyone noticing. If you turn this all around on them, then they will know that you are smart enough to figure them out and that actually pisses them off. Going far enough to expose them will absolutely make them go ape shit to want to retaliate against you but they won’t give you any signs of what they are thinking about getting back at you. They will plot their retaliation silently while also working to keep you lulled in with a false sense of kindness and reassurance towards you, especially after you’ve exposed them, but watch out because their minds are running a marathon on how to tear you apart.Sometimes they lie for no other reason but just because it's wrong to do it and they just felt like it. Sometimes there just isn't any logic or reason behind the lie because they had absolutely no reason to lie whatsoever and they know that. You know they have been honest about worse things in the past and they know that too and they know that you know that. Perhaps they sometimes lie this way just to keep you off balance so that you don't know what to expect or to confuse or baffle you while somehow anticipating that lying this way gives them some kind of advantage in the future or they are just practicing and testing you just for the hell of it because they like to do that in general.Sometimes they lie knowing full well that you will recognize they are lying immediately because they know, but won’t admit, to the same obvious facts that you know. They fully realize that you already know and are aware of everything. Despite this, they will still make it a deliberate point to keep putting that lie right there front and center and in your face anyway. They want this to get to you and they know it will. Silently, they are hoping that it pisses you off or causes a disgusted reaction from you. The motivation behind this kind of lying is just because they want to see and enjoy what they anticipated in advance would be your negatively charged reaction. They enjoy witnessing for themselves that they made you react and feel less than and disrespected which is exactly what they planned for all along. This is torment seeking and it is sadistic and they will play all scenarios of this kind off as them being innocent and you being the aggressive accuser or the crazy one.Sometimes they lie just to entertain themselves and to appreciate giving themselves a silent pat on the back for no other reason than to bask in the joy of getting one over on someone and they will do this even if they think or believe that they are the only ones who will ever know anything about it. These things are the ones they plan to take to their grave with few exceptions and they go to extreme lengths to hide these kinds of things. Then, one day you absolutely shock them when you unexpectedly expose one of these lies and then they relent and tell you I understand if you hate me and I would have taken that to my grave or they will deny it anyway despite force of evidence and actually do take it to their graves with them and with God himself being the only one to ever behold the truth. For the record, those words above have literally been said to me when I outsmarted them and exposed their lies and the game they were trying to play with me. I left them with no choice but to acknowledge it because the force of evidence was indefensible. They messed with the wrong person and that's what I kept secret from them while I observed them and gathered the evidence to drown them with. They were literally toying with me and, at first, I couldn’t prove it. They thought they were watching me like some little puppet on some strings they were pulling that they had complete control of with nothing to worry about and could just do whatever they pleased and play it all off innocently. I suspected this was the case(and it was) so I was quietly watching them watching me and then I also went about secretly doing my research and evidence gathering behind the scenes and they didn’t know that. It was the only way I could prove it and call them out on it.Narcissists, and especially the malignant narcissists, are very cruel and very calculating and extremely petty. Nobody gives a shit about the little micro and nano shits they try to take on people except them because those trivial and callous things and games give them their sense of satisfaction because they can't derive normal means of satisfaction through healthy and orderly functions and operations so they operate like sadistic scoundrels instead all the while trying to cover that up and mask it over. These variants of their lying acts and their motivations behind them are as senseless as they are malicious.The kind of of lying we are talking experiencing here is a type of mental and emotional violence. Lies by themselves are hurtful enough, narcissists go many steps further with it and actually weaponize their lying in a planned and calculated way because they covertly anticipate and make predictions about exactly how they think it is going to affect you down to the very last detail. That’s pure hate and callousness. 188.3k views · View Upvoters · View Sharers
   

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https://www.quora.com/Do-narcissists-always-lie

1. 37 more comments from Frank Marion, Sean Wright, and more 📷 Christine Leov-LealandThis is exactly it: sadistic cruelty. My sister even wrote all of it down in a letter and sent it...